Experience the world through the eyes of Marrow Hale, a college student navigating the complexities of campus life with autism. This touching and insightful story explores the beauty of neurodiversity, the power of supportive friendships, and the joy of finding one's own voice in a literal world.
I look in the mirror, seeing a typical college girl with blonde hair and blue eyes, dressed in my favorite oversized hoodie and jeans. While I look ordinary on the outside, I wake up every day feeling like I’m tuned to a different frequency than the world around me, processing every sound and sight with a unique intensity.
In my morning lecture, I sit in the back row, focusing on my notebook while a group of students laughs at a joke about our professor. They call him an idiot, but I find myself confused because he clearly has a doctorate and extensive knowledge, and my mind can't help but take their words at their literal meaning.
Walking across the bustling campus, the sunlight feels a bit too bright and the chatter of other students sounds like a chaotic symphony. I pull my hood up for comfort, navigating the path to the dining hall while my thoughts race through a dozen different scenarios, overthinking every interaction I've had so far.
I spot my friends Jaxson, Lila, and Maxwell at our usual corner table, a small island of familiarity in the crowded, noisy room. Jaxson catches my eye and offers a small, knowing smile, while Lila is already mid-sentence, her hands moving wildly as she speaks with infectious energy.
As I take my seat, I catch the tail end of Lila’s story about her weekend plans, but the missing context feels like a physical gap in my mind. I blink, trying to process her excitement, and ask what she’s talking about, only for her to wave it off with a casual comment to not worry about it.
Those four words trigger a spiral of overthinking, making me worry that I’ve missed something vital or that I’m being excluded from the group. My brain demands order and information to feel secure, and the lack of clarity feels like static noise that I can’t easily turn down or ignore.
Jaxson notices my tension and gently explains that Lila was just talking about her family’s upcoming trip to the beach next weekend. The relief washes over me instantly, and I murmur a quiet thank you, grateful for a friend who understands that I need the full picture to feel comfortable.
To help me settle, Jaxson expertly pivots the conversation toward the Batfamily and the intricate lore of DC comics. My eyes light up as my hyperfixation takes over, and suddenly the social anxiety of the dining hall fades into the background of my favorite fictional world.
I explain the complex dynamics of the different Robins and the moral code of Gotham, my words flowing faster now that I’m discussing a topic I’ve mastered. People often think autism means I’m quiet or uninterested, but when it comes to my passions, I have more to say than anyone else in the room.
I am not a puzzle to be solved or a person who needs fixing to fit a standard social mold. I am Marrow Hale, navigating a literal world with a complex and vibrant mind, finding my own rhythm alongside friends who see the beauty in my unique perspective.
My name is Marrow Hale. I look ordinary, your typical college girl, blonde hair, blue eyes, no tattoos, occasionally wearing makeup. I wear whatever makes me the most comfortable, generally jeans and a sweatshirt or hoodie in the fall, or if it is summer shorts and a t-shirt. Most days I wake up feeling different. Whether it be because of how I view the world around me or how I think others view me because of how I act. Many do not know about how different my thoughts are from theirs. An example would be when I walked into my first class this morning. I sat alone away from others and listened to a guy who was making a joke about the professor being an idiot. I didn’t get it, after all a brain like mine and many others with autism, tend to go straight for the literal meaning of things, such as jokes like what the guy told his friend. I left that class without thinking much of it before heading to lunch. When I finally reached the dining hall my friends Jaxson, Lila, and Maxwell were already sitting at our usual table in the far corner. Okay Maxwell sounds too formal, so everyone just calls him Max. By the time I already reached my chair Lila was halfway through talking animatedly about what I believed to be her plans this weekend “and that’s why I am looking forward to next weekend!” I turned to look at her and blinked “What?” She shrugs and brushes me off “don’t worry about it!” But now I am worrying about it because my brain does not like not knowing something because I have a habit of overthinking everything. I always need to know what is going on or happening around me. “Lila was just talking about her family’s trip to the beach next weekend” Jaxson explained, his brown eyes locking with mine. I look visibly much more relieved. “Thank you” I mumble, not trying to draw much attention to myself. Jaxson shrugs and quickly changes the topic to something I am interested in, DC. Yes, like the Batfamily and all of that. I know it seems awkward for someone like me to like stuff like that but another thing about autism is intense focus on specific things otherwise called hyperfixation. (Also include more autisitc things and common misconceptions and why I (Marrow) would be against them.) (first person pov from marrow)
